Monday 18 July 2011

The many balances of life

At present I have a life-changing conundrum to consider.
Here's the situation; at present I have a terrible, soul-polluting, go nowhere, mind-rotting succubus of a job. On the plus side outside of work my life is pretty sweet, I have a great girlfriend, a home I enjoy living in, fantastic friends and I am able to pursue the hobbies that I enjoy.
After many job applications its looking like I might have to move in order to get a decent job. This would mean giving up living with my girlfriend in our own place and moving in with my parents. She would remain where we are now as she has a job she has wanted for years secured. I would be 3 hours at the other end of the country and although we would probably see each other every 2 week or so it would still be fucking soul-destroying.
How dominant should our careers be in our lives? It's not as if I would be moving for a 'dream job' but rather one that would make me not want to stab myself in the face with a blunt pair of scissors everyday, which I guess is most people's experience of a good job. I would be losing all that makes my life enjoyable, at present, just for the chance to do something I wouldn't mind doing rather than doing something that I have craved doing for years.
As much as this sounds like pointless pontification I am a pragmatist. I understand that in this world you have to look after yourself as there is no one who is going to doing for you and I do need to get a decent job with a future. Should this be the #1 priority in my life? Should I give up everything that is good in my life to pursue a job that I only do in order to live and allow me to enjoy the 2 days a week I don't have to work?
Fuck! Life can really be a cunty mistress at times.

Sunday 8 May 2011

I need to reclaim my sleep.

I do love a good book. One that you makes you wake up an hour early just to get some extra reading time in before the day begins in earnest. Recently Robert Ludlum's books are cutting my nights sleep down quite considerably, I'm staying up later and getting up earlier just so I can cram as much immersion into the world of fictional espionage as possible. Whilst contemplating this semi-insomnia inducing phenomena I came to the conclusion that only novels that many would consider 'trashy' or 'silly' are the ones that keep me wide-eyed into the early hours. I read my fair share of non-fiction and 'proper' books but these never quite yield the power to keep me awake beyond my natural sleepy times. I have come to realise that I should not be ashamed of my reading habits (there is more than enough shame in my life) but proud that I am able to enjoy something that is relatively cheap, easy and non-disruptive with such an all encompassing feeling of joy, excitement and wonder.